NAVIGATING the mental and emotional landscape of current American culture is exhausting. We are divided and fearful, with a constant disillusioning doomscroll of discord.
Given the national mood, many of us wonder what we can do. Modeling our values is our most direct path, and recognizing what is within our control is a good place to start, with our choices, beliefs, and responses to others.
Small moments of thoughtfulness make a difference. We can hold the door for a stranger, wave back at the children on the bus, or slow down to let a car pass on a narrow road. It is in valuing the wellbeing of others that our ability to be present and regard other people becomes a way of life. This provides opportunities to deepen our relationships with all living beings. After all, our actions are what ultimately define us, whether in alignment with, or contrary to, what we say we believe.
It takes resilience and vulnerability to develop a tolerance for discomfort in a reality filled with harsh, chaotic uncertainty. I’m not saying disregard yourself or your needs, but try a broader perspective. The willingness to “give of yourself ” is life advice from my late father. What I understood he meant by that was to think about how it might be for someone else, to help create harmony in accordance with our common humanity.
Phrases like ‘actions speak louder than words’ ring true because of how they measure character and integrity. Doing your best to consistently show kindness and consideration, decency and respect, grace and humility, curiosity and love, is a lot to live up to in a world that can frustrate and undermine such efforts.
My experience is that a majority of us want to be included and accepted. We seek to live from a system of values that connect us to ourselves, each other, and the world we inhabit. Seeing others as complex and nuanced is worth leaning into.
As an artist I use the lens of: how do I depict and engage the world around me? Are my responses being communicated in ways that can be received? It is in this act of consideration that artistic expression transcends social bounds and speaks soulfully.
Even in our best efforts we fall short of our ideals. This is why we are called to continually reconsider how authentically our actions are aligned with the values we espouse. Each failure to live up to our values is an opportunity for learning and growth. It takes practice.
We look to the wisest leaders throughout history because they reflect this. Jesus Christ said, “love your neighbor as yourself.” The Dalai Lama said, “anger and hatred are signs of weakness, but compassion is a sure sign of strength.” Maya Angelou said, “people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”
We have to acknowledge our human limitations and the depravity of bad actors as part of the human condition; but there also lies a space we can fill.
Use your time and energy to uplift. Encourage a struggling friend, demonstrate empathy for the parent with a screaming child, attempt to better understand someone with whom you disagree.
While they will often be under-appreciated, there will never be too many considerate actions.
